Sorrow, Starlight and Love

Screen Shot 2014-12-22 at 12.32.00 PM

Dear Ones,

‘Oh, Holy Night, the stars are brightly shining, it is the night of the dear Savior’s birth.’…..We can stand in reverence of the boundless beauty and wonder of the stars. So, too, can we stand numb with sorrow at our lives bereft of the presence of those we have loved as our children. The profound mystery of life and death can never find full revelation in our limited mortal minds. The loss and despair when a child passes is a sorrow like no other, an endless dark night without stars. Heaven has slipped from our arms, left aching with longing and stripped to the bone with anguish. We know somewhere in the depths of our soul, that we have also been somehow blessed, but the unbearable loss overwhelms until even the light of the rising sun on a beautiful world is dimmed by our grief-blinded eyes.

But this is a big story, a mighty story, and one that has been lived through at the highest echelons of existence. Through the Holy Mother and her Son. Please, I ask you, let me share some of these thoughts with you, for I, too, have known the loss of a baby boy as well as that of my oldest son who grew to be a man.

Our babies are mighty spirits. They first appear to us in tiny, tender, precious mortal bodies. But the power of their spirit hovers around them, so impressive we can feel it even from far away. Theirs is a process of the great and immortal Spirit incarnating into a tiny growing body. They have loved us before birth. Often they can be directly responsible for our meeting and loving as parents which has given rise to their earthly being. In uniting us they are working with angels to bring this about. How can we earthbound ones prevail when they can have heavenly aid in their quest to be on earth? Witness how often the parents had other plans set in place when the new one suddenly announces its presence, often through seemingly impossible barriers! Oh, they want to get here!

But soon, so very soon after their arrival, we come to love them, even if they are unexpected, and cannot then imagine life without them. This is the wonder of the heavenly power of love. But then when they die, we are suddenly asked to live life ‘without them’ here in the physical world. Why, oh, why? How can this have meaning?

Dear Ones, through the agonizing experience of grief, try to imagine this. Our angel children live in the spiritual world filled with love, for truth and love prevail as the law of spiritual existence. But they cannot work concretely and powerfully into world life unless they have a connection on earth. And that is through us, the parents. They need to acquire a physical body, even if only briefly. The reasons are threefold, to make a physical bond with the parents, as well as soul and spiritual one, and to acquire what is known as the life body.

As human beings we are body, soul and spirit. And more. We need a vital body of life, often called the “etheric” body. This body has our life vitality and the blueprint for our growth and the shape of our physical being, for our metabolism and reproductive capacities. It is the life giving, invigorating organism that penetrates our physical body. With death the interpenetrating life body leaves us and then the physical body alone remains. The physical body is under the laws of gravity and material earth and will soon begin to disintegrate as the life body no longer enlivens and sustains it. All schools of ancient and integrative medicine recognize the organizing, healing aspect of the invisible, but vital, life body.

The powerful, sacrificing, and loving souls that are the spirits of the children who die young, come to us with exalted intention. To awaken us to love, to bond with us, to join us in our lives, and they will not leave us.. They are connectors. They are the direct line to the spirit. They come as awakeners. They come to strengthen the communication between us and the spiritual world. They love us and wish us to be spirit blessed and offer their sweet young lives to make this happen. Having lived in a body and intertwined through the etheric connection with us, they can do so as a bridge from this world to the next. This can be their life mission.

In their crossing back they do not ultimately suffer pain or sorrow, but longing. Longing to join with us.. to be with us, and to be with us in this new state means we need awaken to their invisible spiritual presence there, always loving us. Loving us for our whole lives. Without end. Oh, what sadness all around if we cannot awaken to their continuing love and presence. It is hard, so hard, to lose their physical presence here, but we are asked to take up the huge task , to find our connection to them in spiritual reality, however subtly there. They are our life line to the spirit.

How to find comfort in our grieving? Look to the Holy archetypes. This has all been lived out on the earthly plane to aid us in going through our sorrow and separation. It is has been written into the story of humanity so LOVE can be known in the world. Buddha brought Love and Compassion but Christ gave His life for it. He went through His deed of the most agonizing death to deeply unite with the depths of human suffering, the suffering of the entire world so Universal Love could rise in humanity. The resurrecting power of Love. For everyone. A deed for all the world. And the Holy Mother went through it with him. The Holy Father held it all. Joseph gave protection to her for the divinely ordained birthing the Holy child and guarding his young life.

When our children die young, the unused forces of their vital life body then strengthen the etheric world from whence comes all life on earth. They give their etheric bodies which had the latent power that could have lived a long life, into the etheric realm of the earth’s life body. It is there, in this all embracing universal life realm of the earth, that Christ is appearing in his second coming. He is not appearing in a singular way in one physical body, confined to one physical space. He is coming in multiple appearances through the very vitality of universal existence of life, and thus is able to appear to souls simultaneously over the whole planet. He is Omnipresent. His Love for us is so powerful that it has multiplied beyond our power to imagine. He seeks to heal, forgive, enliven, lift up, and resurrect the human spirit within every human soul to it’s own individual holy dimensions. His deed is for every human being on the planet, including those disconnected from spiritual awareness, those that have degraded the meaning of Christianity to levels of their own self serving arrogance, and all those acting out of life-denying, extremist dogmas. He is there with renewing life and hope for all. So also is the mission of His Holy Mother.

Through the power of the Father God, the Son performed his deed of ultimate sacrifice, never turning away from the love of the Father. The Holy Mother held it all in her heart. She sheltered the blessed Christ child in her womb, gave birth after travail on a cold winter night and placed the Holy Child in a manger, surrounded by lowly animals. She held her sacred child in regal dignity as the kings bowed before him with gifts. Thirty three years later, the Holy mother remained steadfastly at the foot of the cross fully awake in witness to her son’s agonizing death She has borne the unbearable. She has borne it for all of us. She has borne it through her love of her Son, and the protection and Love of the Father. Her mantle of protective love can surround us as we struggle to endure the unbearable on earth. Her mantle, star spangled with the wisdom of the heavens, can enfold us and comfort us in enduring the dark night of the soul, of our terrible loss. She embraces all humanity with Her gentle loving protection and eternal knowing. She is ever there for us, in the abiding faith of her suffering and experience of transforming her own loss to the highest cosmic awareness. She is the chalice of the eternal wisdom that the divine purpose of all existence is Love.

Our baby’s spirits return to heaven as joyful emissaries who have met love on the earth in the arms of their parents. Parents who found them precious and holy and worthy of adoring worship. Like simple shepherds, like humbled kings, we kneel down before our children in adoration. For it is true, our little ones are like the Christ Child. The Holy innocent one who gave himself to humanity in Love. Our precious innocent, holy children are born through us and come into our arms to experience the love we create in our hearts, our devotion, our reverence, our striving for universal Love. They gift us with knowing what it means to love at profound levels we hardly knew possible. For Love is the very purpose of evolution, our earth is meant to become a planet of Love.   This is the heart of the meaning of Life.

Our young children returning to heaven take Love with them, our generated love, radiated with the stardust of holy innocence and vibrantly alive with the vitality of their potent life bodies. So Love is born, Love is borne, back into the universe, multiplied, exponentially expanded, heavenly love plus human love. These beautiful souls are the amazing, the exalted, radiantly sweet ‘ambassadors to heaven’! Bringing the good news. The glad tidings that YES! Love can be found on earth! “We have found love in our mothers and father’s arms! Earth’s mission is being fulfilled!” they announce to all the angels and heavenly beings. “There is love on the earth and we bring you good tidings of great joy that shall be to all Heaven! Unto Earth is born this day a Savior, Christ the Lord and we come as Christ love-filled children back to heaven with the good news. There is Love in Heaven and Love on Earth! May heaven and nature sing! Glory be to God in the Highest!

So do these radiant spirit children, filled with that love, and energy and vitality, light up the heavens, the stars, the very ethereal garments of the Christ to strengthen and make glorious His light-filled appearance to all humanity. Dear Ones, you have held heaven in your arms, you have had those arms stripped to the bone in aching grief, your hearts broken open, even as the exalted ones and countless others before us. Please know the comfort of the Holy Mother is ever there. We are held in Her love and her starry mantle of protection and comfort through the darkest night, the hardest journey, the greatest sorrow. For she endured and continues to endure it all. For all mankind. She is there, everywhere, holding the Christmas light, the Christ child, in her arms radiating the good news that Love is born and there for all humanity. In higher awareness, may we break through the worldly degradation of Christmas to know the eternal and universal truth of this Christmas story and His deed for the world for all cycles of time to come.

The Holy Mother’s glorious star covered mantle is symbolic of the Love and Light with which the father God holds Her as she bears the holy Child. She holds all souls wrapped in her protection even has she swaddled and held the tender child. Lean to her. Lay your head on her lap. Even as she has known the ultimate Holy loss, you have as well, and she is carrying the loss with us and suffering for us all and offering healing.

May the Holy protective and comforting Love be there for you in your grief and sorrow and new state of loving that may be born. Hug your loved ones around you. Go out on this Christmas night to behold the radiant stars, reminders we are all part of this glorious universe and our precious children, beautiful, striving, spiritually fulfilled individuals, who have given their lives to help make it so.

Nancy Jewel Poer, Christmas, 2014


THE LITTLE GOAT AND THE CHRISTMAS ANGEL, Story to Celebrate Animals at Advent

IMG_5820Screen Shot 2014-12-16 at 1.52.22 PM

December 15, 2014

Here is a sweet Christmas Advent story and a final chapter just happened!

Some thirty five years , a lady named Carol Clifton, who was  a hand craft teacher at Sacramento Waldorf School, acquired an angora goat in the hopes of getting some lovely wool fleece.  The little goat had long silky white hair, and curly horns but, alas, she was a very ornery goat!  Carol hoped the school gardener would keep her goat but he (probably wisely) said he couldn’t offer the school farm as a home for this pretty but rascally goat.  Carol was quite upset at the prospect of trying to find a home for her.  But at last she found our family, that had many animals all ready, along with six children to enjoy them, and asked us if we could take the feisty little goat.  When we said ,”Yes!”  she was so relieved!   So we took the little Curly,as we called her for her curving horns and wavy hair and enjoyed her along with our other pets for some time.

I had grown up with the stories of Billy Whiskers and his wife goat, Nanny, and I so loved these stories of these mischievous goats, and when I was about ten, two silky fleeced angora goats we named Blanco and Snowball had wandered into our mountain home at Julian when a herd of them had been moved up from the desert. We had great fun with them all summer.

Carol Clifton would gather the lovely fleece from the little goat and she would often tell the goat story to her school children as she was preparing them for fleecing the sheep in third grade clothing block. She taught many many children over the years (and all of ours) and entertained them with stories of Curly.  Carol is now retired and  I haven’t seen her in many years. I didn’t even remember the goat story. Now here is the delightfully mysterious part of the story.

On December 15th, I had to go to a doctor in Vacaville and we were deciding where we would eat before doing errands in Fair Oaks on the way home. We decided on an Indian restaurant and went there.  To our surprise, there were Carol and Marlies Schade, a community rhythmical massage therapist, having a lunch to celebrate Carol’s birthday.  Marlies had brought Carol a gift she had made, an angel with a star, inspired by the Shepherd’s play that has always been done at Christmas in the Waldorf schools.  In the play the angel holds a golden star and gently lowers it over sweet mother Mary’s when she brings the baby Jesus into her arms. It is such a timeless magical moment in a wonderful play about jolly humorous shepherds who become overwhelmed with the wonder at the Holy child. Our son, Cameron, has played a shepherd more than once.

On the day of this most special meeting Carol and Marlies had  been talking about the little goat and Carol was saying how grateful she was we had taken that goat so many years ago and we walked in just at at that moment! Then  Carol brought this beautiful little angel gift she had received over to show us as we were eating our lunch. And here is the wonder of it all! Marlies had used the fleece of our little angora goat, Curly, to create the angel’s wings! For Carol still had some of the fleece all these years later.  Marlies has a life long connection with the world of the elementals and awareness of the vibrant energy they ray out. And angels too. She  says that the wispy silky strands of the soft white goat hair are like the lively rays of heavenly life and light energy the angels send down to us.

Surely the angels and all our loved ones in heaven guide us to make connections and have unexpected meetings here we might never have made with out them.  But how about this for a story of amazing ‘coincidence’!? ” Even little goats can get into the karmic picture of things… So we share this Christmas animal Advent story with you as a reminder of how precious life and every connection is and the wonderful gifts the animals give to our lives. And so we can be filled with Christmas wonder of how we are continually blessed from heaven in ever so many ways! Nancy and Gordon Poer, December 2014


Screen Shot 2014-12-03 at 7.12.57 PMScreen Shot 2014-12-03 at 7.32.36 PMScreen Shot 2014-12-03 at 7.45.15 PM

(If you click on the pictures, they enlarge to full size)

Thanksgiving, 2014

It was a perfect day. Clear sunny skies, pleasant gentle breeze,just before the rains.  We have had many wonderful Thanksgivings here at White Feather Ranch, so memorable through the years, and especially we have enjoyed giving the experience of an American Thanksgiving to those experiencing it for the first time.  This year seemed a very special culmination, with friends and family, now young adults, that we have watched  grow up and have children of their own and new friends with global family from India and China. Most of all everyone, young and old, enjoyed the day, visiting, sharing food, festival, games and fun, Our dream as we built this mountain home 28 years ago, was to have it be a place to renew and celebrate life. That is what gives us such joy and fulfillment for having stewardship of this beautiful place all these years, to  be able to share it with many and see them relax and laugh and enjoy life, all generations, all backgrounds together.  World community, where we meet in peace and gratitude for the privilege of the world we share and our humanity.

We both deeply realize it is a profound blessing for Gordon and me to still be here to host it together and both still be able to do so. Gordon was wonderful calling out the Virginia Reel and taking great delight in giving everyone rides on the old truck a 1926 Dodge Graham and still running thanks to Gordon!  Its a bumpy sight seeing ride around the ranch from another time.  Visitors gleefully went down the zip line, piled wood on the bon fire, played pool and basketball.  The ‘talent’ show sharing was especially delightful with our grandsons Nathan and Jonas on violin and cello making beautiful contributions and young Farinika playing a fine Grieg concerto on the piano.  Singing, poems, sharing to delight the heart all culminating with a very loud, joyous and rousing game of Pictionary, a truly fun game with team work and intuition abounding.

We have been blessed with a wonderful place to share and wonderful friends who have come to share with us.  Thanks for Thanksgiving!